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NAKED AND UNDONE
Feb 24, 2005, The Malay Mail

By Errol de Cruz. Click to enlarge

Daddy’s (not so) little girl grows up and bares her soul

LOOK at Denise Freeman’s debut album, and you’ll have flashbacks of Christine Keeler at the height of the Profumo scandal in the ’70s.

She sits on a chair on the cover and the inside showcases a few more daring poses. Then you remember that this is the young girl who won the Sri Sathya Sai World Peace Festival song contest in the ’90s.

That young girl, however, has come a long way, and the career path she’s taken includes stints as a copywriter, chef, English teacher, resettlement officer, culture workshop coordinator, and, last but not least, poet.

It wasn’t an easy road by any measure. In her teens, she, like her mother and sisters, occasionally fell victim to her father’s temper, and she suffered silently, first watching her parents break-up and, years later, hearing the news of her dad’s death from a heart attack – in another woman’s home.

The result? She still loves the man and admits that he still is her greatest inspiration.

Denise Freeman, now 35, is brutally frank about her life, and frankly had me wondering just how much could go into print. Thankfully, there were no holds barred.

"That’s the only way I can come to terms with it," she said, sipping on a coke at the National Press Club late last week, “and I’ve expressed it all in my writing."

Denise’s father, Ernie Freeman, was a celebrity in his own right. A dredgemaster by profession (the youngest in his time), he was also a singer, musician, radio playwright, palmist, story-teller and poetic philosopher. Quite a package.

When the tin-mining industry slumped, he left Perak and moved to Petaling Jaya where he opened two country music bars – Cattlemen’s Inn (with the late Vincent Lloyd) and his own Gold Canyon in 1987, after that partnership broke up – and soon earned the title, Father of Country and Western Music.

The bars closed down after a while, and Ernie passed away soon after his 53rd birthday in 1992, but by then, Denise Ann, 22, had already her mark.

She had begun singing at the age of five, and at seven she was confidently singing country hits with Ernie on guitar, her mother playing the organ and her sisters singing and playing acoustic guitars, as well, entertaining all and sundry, in swanky four-part harmony.

Denise started writing poetry at 13 and by 14, she was playing the guitar and composing songs. To date, she has written more than 200 poems some of which she has published, entitled A Lyrical Life.

At 16, she entered the Sri Sathya Sai World Peace Festival song contest and won first prize for best rendition and best composition, the prize taking her to Perth, Australia.

Back from that holiday, she also jammed with several bands at her father’s Gold Canyon.

When she turned 20, Denise hit the stage again, singing to a large audience at the Strange Days concert, organised by Peter Brown and Markiza Hassan. Held at the British Council, the proceeds of the tickets went to the Malayan Nature Society.

Not long after, Markiza also featured Denise’s song, Up On A Hill on her album, Open Secret.

On the personal side, however, life was just the opposite.

Unwittingly, she fell in love with an older (and married) man, but the sizzle fizzled when her mom, Yvonne, found out and told her they’d “have frogs for kids because he’s so ugly".

"I realised that I was looking for a father figure, and worse, I was becoming just like my father!" she admitted. "Like all kids, I had picked up his dominant traits." "So, to find out why I was like that, I had to find out why he was like that," she added.

On the therapy side, there was some counselling and tai-chi, but what got all the pent-up emotions out was a 10-page letter she wrote to her dad – years after he had passed on.

"I read it over and over again, and it took four long years before I could read it without crying." Doing some research into Ernie’s id, she learnt much about him. He had married a pregnant Yvonne when he was 18, she a year younger.

"I’m sure he felt robbed of his youth," Denise said, "and cheated in life, generally."

"Understanding all that made it quite simple," she offered. "After all, he was just a man."

"I still feel his presence in my life – and it’s nothing but love."

In 1999, Denise left for Finland and then Romania, where she ended up as a guest chef at the Bucharest Hilton’s Malaysian Food Fair.

"I had the hotel’s GM over for a meal, and he soon called with the offer to manage the hotel’s two-week Malaysian food fest," she laughed. To think that she only learnt to cook out of necessity, craving for the traditional delicacies of her homeland. “"I missed my nasi lemak and it was too expensive to eat out."

Besides that stint, Denise also worked as a copywriter at an international media agency, wrote a book of poems and managed a host of projects before deciding to come home and record the album that was in the making all her life. Listening to the lyrics on Naked And Undone is like reading her autobiography.

"I decided that 17 years of song-writing was too incredible to contain," she explained.

Then she lost a friend in a train accident and it cemented the decision.

"If something happened to me, there would be no record of anything I’d been through."

Hence, Naked And Undone.

"I love tangibility," she offered. “This has nothing to do with becoming rich or famous, although I would like to recoup what I’ve invested in the album,"Denise said. "I hope the people who listen to it will get a sense of me and what I’m like."

The ‘naked’ is the physical, and the ‘undone’ the emotional side, she explains.

The album features eight of her best songs, backed by local artistes Julian Mokhtar, Jaime Wilson, Jimmie Loh, Popshuvit’s J.D. Wong and Bada, and the repertoire ranges from funky folk and blues to soul and country and western.

"Putting this album together was an incredible journey," Denise said.

"What makes it so special is that I got to work with some exciting people and I had input from people I grew up with, including Rafique Rashid, Peter and Markiza Hassan, Antares and Amir Yusoff."

The red spot on the album cover was originally designed as James Bond concept. The shooter aims, his victim in clear view. The victim is vulnerable, an open target.

The photograph of Denise and the red circle portray a person being caught; but the idea is not about her being physically naked so much as being naked or undone emotionally.

"The title implies that the singer is an open diary,” she said. The circle also symbolises life being a full circle of comings and goings, of the seven main chakras and about censorship.

"The result is a culmination of my past and present; a reflection of whom I am – an open book."

"And I’m sure my Daddy will be proud of me."

One of Denise’s ambitions is to have her father’s works published, and this list includes children’s stories, poems, plays and also a book on Eurasians in Malaysia.

"But, I’m not ready. I want to research his research and I think I’ll only be ready when I’m as old as he was when he wrote them."

* Denise Ann Freeman will launch Naked and Undone at Alexis Bistro, Ampang (Feb 24, March 11 and 12), La Bodega, Jln Tung Shin, KL (Feb 25), Backyard Pub & Grill(Feb 26) and Havana, Changkat Bukit Bintang ( March 10).

Links: Denise Freeman | Profile | Musiccanteen |

© News Straits Times Press Bhd

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